Last Updated on March 20, 2023
Beat Motel used to be a printed zine, now it is a podcast.
What is Beat Motel?
Beat Motel is published every now and then, it’s meant to be quarterly but never is. Beat Motel is a ‘no stress’ publication, meaning we flat out refuse to get stressed over any aspect of the zine, and also refuse to succumb to any pressure levied on us by bands, labels, PR agents etc. Beat Motel has no specific agenda with regards to music, but we like to think our politics are pretty clear, basically ‘be excellent to each other, relax, and have fun’.
Beat Motel is kinda a punk zine but our musical tastes are pretty broad and a bunch of our writing has chuff all to do with either punk or music. We like laughing at childish rubbish but we also sometimes like being serious. We’ll be using this webshite to give you information on each issue we put out and a bit of junk about our writers but that’s about it. All the actual content will be in the printed zine. We like real zines and don’t want this site to become a webzine, not that there’s anything wrong with webzines, but hey, you can’t read them on the crapper!
We review releases (CDs, DVDs, Vinyl & Wax Cylinders), we review live music and books. We also review nice presents and technical do-dads that cool folk send us, well at least we would if anyone sent any gidgits. What’s a gidgits you may ask, and if you have to ask them I guess you’re not the right person to send us gidgits. But as we’re a ‘no stress’ publication there’s little point in bugging us about stuff you’ve sent in to review, read Beat Motel and you’ll get a flavour of our tastes. Actually that being said we are very open to new music, putting out a zine and refusing to listen to new music is a bit like being a dog and refusing to sniff other dog’s arses. Well apart from the whole arse sniffing aspect I guess, we’re not really into that sort of thing, so if you bump into us on the streets there’s little point in dropping your trolleys, although it would amuse us greatly. Thanks for reading, the word ‘poo’ is funny.
To get the full Beat Motel picture you have to buy the zine!
We’ll review pretty much anything, so send in your demo, album, zine, book, game, dvd, pies and we’ll do our best to get round to writing about them. Don’t be hassling us about it though, if you’ve sent something in for review then hold your bloody horses, pestering us by any method of communication to ask if we’ve reviewed you yet is a sure fire way to get us angry, and you wouldn’t like us when we’re angry.
We don’t review MP3s, if you can’t be arsed to send us a cd we can’t be arsed to review you.
If you disagree with the slating you’ve got then tough, you can’t please everyone all the time, if you don’t want our opinion (and after all it is only an opinion) then don’t send your stuff to us!
We review as much as possible, but we can’t promise to review absolutely everything as we get a jaw dropping amount of stuff every day. You stand a better chance of getting reviewed if you show originality, passion or include some sort of bribe!
If your press sheet contains the phrases ‘hottest live act’ or ‘best kept secret’ it will be shredded and used to light small fires and your cd will be used as a bird scarer on our allotment.
If you send us your CD you can take it as read we’re adding you to our mailing list, after all, you want to know what your review says doncha foo?